Giordano’s

Last weekend I went to Chicago.  Chicago is an absolutely wonderful city, with lots of places that draw me in and eat away at my daylight hours.  For example, if someone simply says, “The Art Institute of Chicago,” I automatically am drawn into the conversation.  If someone mentions, “Blue Man Group,” I jump in passionately.  Looking at paintings is one of the things I consider to be exquisitely enjoyable, and Blue Man Group is my favorite theatrical production (I’ve seen it four times), and both are readily available in Chicago.  Needless to say, I was quite pleased with the decision to go to that city.  However, Chicago features one of the most succulent culinary attractions I have ever discovered: Giordano’s Pizza.  I like to consider myself somewhat of a pizza connoisseur.  I admit that I am willing–nay, insistent–to sacrifice a few more dollars to get good pizza.  I actively seek out pizza of quality and character.  Giordano’s pizza, located at the epicenter of the deep dish earthquake, certainly ranks among my favorite of all pizzas.  Contrary to most “deep dish” pizza I’ve found other places, Giordano’s pizza totally deserves the name.  Also known as stuffed crust, servers walk out of the kitchen carrying platters full of 1.5 inch vertical deliciousness.  The pizza is made by pretty much taking a pile of cheese and other toppings, smashing it into a brick, encasing it in dough, smothering the top with tomato sauce and other toppings, baking it in an extremely hot oven, and then celebrating in the deliciousness of the masterpiece.  Over the course of three days, I had the pleasure to eat at Giordano’s twice.  Of all the places in Chicago, Giordano’s was definitely at the top of my list.

After eating a variety of slew of different pizzas, I have often been asked as to why I like Giordano’s so much.  I often am at a lack of words and come up with a mediocre or unsatisfactory response.  However, having put a little thought into it, I will attempt to answer the question and also attempt to draw a philosophical metaphor to life in general.  The secret about Giordano’s is the fact that there is a beautiful balance between complete endulgence and a maintainence of order.  I will explain: a Giordano’s pizza doesn’t hold anything back.  The chefs fill it as deep as it can go, and throw in as many toppings as will properly fit.  Yet there is still a fit.  The pizza is presented artistically and tastefully.  It is not bulging over the crust, or deep to the point of being cooked in a bucket.  There is harmony in the pizza.

This pizza has become a representation about how I want to live.  Though I often fall short of my ideals, if I were to achieve them every time they would be reality and therefore not ideals any more.  They are ideals because I constantly have to work for them.  Anyways, the ideal of balance is very important to me, but it is a balance of living as fully as possible.  I strive to excel in every aspect of my life.  I usually lack natural talent, but when I want to succeed in something I will gladly put in the work and the sweat necessary.  I look for opportunities and ways to improve.  I try to be as efficient and productive as possible.  Basically, I try to make every aspect of life as adventurous as I can.  Yet at the same time, balance is required.  Life is full of various responsibilities and activities.  It is impossible to focus on a single one, all the time.  As balance is achieved, life becomes rich and full.  Just like Giordano’s pizza.  The pizza is a representation of an ideal, and that is why I like it so much.

“Follow Me”

As I was studying the gospel of John in the New Testament I was impressed by the some of the last recorded words of the Savior. He is walking with the apostle Peter, informing him that when he is old he will be crucified. This, naturally, must have caused Peter to be at least a little startled. Were I to be told the manner in which I would be killed (or even that I would be killed), I think life would take on a different meaning. The Savior then put forth some of the most powerful words He offers: “Follow me.”

At this instance it becomes apparent, at least to the reader, what it means to follow Christ. For a long time I was not sure about this details of this principle. It was troubling to me that in order to follow Christ, in every literal sense, we must die for the truth. However, it was unsettling in a sense different than what might be expected. After all, through the restoration of the gospel through Joseph Smith, we can have a sure knowledge of the Plan of Salvation: a knowledge of who we are, why we are here, where we come from, and, perhaps most comforting, where we are going. Death is not the end! Rather than being confused about the act of dying, the question of how one goes about getting killed as a martyr was the enigma. Surely, that is beyond the control of one person. A true disciple of Christ, one who sincerely seeks to follow in His footsteps, must be willing to follow Him even to death. Examples of martyrs throughout history provide types to help others come to know Christ. Peter, Stephen, Joseph Smith, and others lived lives dedicated to serving the Savior. Even in death they followed Him.

Of course, martyrdom is not required to gain exaltation in the kingdom of God. The principle of following Christ, even unto death, is deeper than our actions. It is consecrating ourselves as Christ consecrated Himself. Christ came to earth with a mission, for which He would have to lay down His life. In my opinion, this principle is embodied more in Christ’s words, “not my will, but thine, be done” than in the crucifixion. His words describe the state of His heart; His actions prove it. So, for the vast majority of people sincerely striving to follow Christ, it is not necessary to die as a martyr. Yet all who sincerely seek to follow that path must be willing to give whatever God requires, even unto death. When we can truly say that we are willing to die, or, sometimes even more difficult, willing to live for the truth, then we know that we are on the path that Christ set. We can know we are following Him.

For Peter, it must have been difficult to hear the Savior prophesy of Peter’s death. Yet from that moment forward Peter dedicated His life to serving Christ. Knowing full well what the end would bring, Peter did not stop pressing forward for Christ. The same Peter who, not much time previous, had buckled under the pressure and denied Christ, spent the rest of his life following Him even to the cross. Peter began to be converted because he began to have the faith to be made whole.  Like the man at the pool of Bethesda, recorded in John, chapter 5, Jesus offered to Peter healing.  After being denied by him three times, Christ offered forgiveness to Peter.  He demonstrated His infinite love by allowing Peter the opportunity to have a second chance.  In so doing, He healed Peter.  Thus Peter not only witnessed (as he had in the past), but was the one receiving the healing.  As this happened, the power of Christ became personal.  He began to allow the truth to change his heart.  So should we act.  The path of discipleship is anything but easy.  Yet, as the man at Bethesda discovered, and as Peter discovered, by following Christ He will make us whole.  As Christ extended the invitation to Peter to follow Him (and be healed by Him), He extends it, on an individual basis, to each person on earth.

Carded

Last Saturday I was at the grocery store buying some groceries. I was moving along the refrigerated aisle, minding my own business, when Henry Weinhard’s cream soda decided to call out to me. Lacking an adequate amount of grocery shopping control, I opted to purchase a case. I rationalized it with the heavy workload I’m facing this week, and decided would make a nice motivator for me. I continued wandering through the store until I had enough food in my cart to sustain me throughout this week, and I moved to the check-out lane. As the woman ringing up my groceries scanned the case of cream soda, she stopped. Her face became puzzled, she pushed her “rescan” key, and scanned the case a second time. She then shook her head and explained to her bagger her disbelief that the system wanted my drivers license. I had a feeling of lightness come over me as I realized the absurdity of the situation: I was being carded for cream soda. I checked the ingredients for alcohol, and naturally finding none, I shrugged and offered my license. The employee was still in disbelief, and continued to ring me up.

After a few more seconds the employee had an idea of why the system wanted my license. Anyone familiar with Henry Weinhard’s fine sodas will notice the similarity between the soda bottles and beer bottles. Both are packaged similarly. The employee suggested that often times underage drinkers will come into the store, pick up a case of Henry Weinhard’s soda, but replace the original product with beer. When they are paying for their groceries, the person ringing up the soda doesn’t recognize that the bottles and the packaging do not match. Thus, in order to prevent this dishonesty and underage drinking, the store automatically requires a drivers license for the purchase of Henry Weinhard’s sodas.

As I’ve had time to reflect on this experience, I’ve noticed some interesting parallels between the system of the store and the system of God, our Father in Heaven. Just as the country has various laws for the safety of its citizens, so, too, does God have laws that will ensure us safety and peace as we follow them. The store had implemented a system to uphold those laws, and also implemented a system to prevent people from finding loopholes whereby they could break those laws without others knowing. Similarly, we are unable to receive the blessings with which God would bless us if we follow some other way. There is no way to cheat the system of heaven. The Savior described this principle in the gospel of Matthew, chapter seven, verses thirteen and fourteen: “Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.” If we are to enter into the Kingdom of our God–both on earth as we receive innumerable blessings from Him, and in the eternal world as we enter and reside in His presence–we must follow the way He set forth. There is only one gate that leads to that kingdom, and that is by following His laws. Fortunately for us, each of His laws are both possible and in our best interest. While it does require the disciple to humble himself or herself, we can have the assurance that if we rely on Him, He will prepare a way. And when we falter, we can be forgiven. It is a way of grace and of peace. And just as a sly, underage drinker would get caught at the last minute, we are unable to cheat our way into it.

Motorbikes

This fall, when gasoline prices were exorbitant, I decided to join the crowd of fuel-savvy travellers and invest in a motorbike. I had never really been that interested in motorbikes before. Rather, I always felt the risks outweighed the benefits. However, after living in Thailand for two years, my views on the whole matter began to change. It seems that almost everyone in Thailand drives a motorbike; it is by far the most convenient way to travel within a city. As a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I always either rode in taxis (in Bangkok) or rode a bike. At first I was an avid proponent of the bicycle as a means of transportation. After all, it is even more economical than a motorbike, and it can help sustain good health due to the requirement of physical output. However, after my first Thai hot season (March-May) I began to seriously consider the benefits of driving a motorbike.

I was still wary of them when I returned, however. It wasn’t until after I went back a few months later did I begin to understand why I felt that way. One beautiful Bangkok morning I got out early to try to find a place that my family and I could do laundry. As I was walking along the road outside our hotel, I noticed a motorcycle taxi waiting to be hired. Up until that point, I had never so much as sat on a motorcycle. However, I decided to give it a spin, and asked the driver to take me to a laundry place. He spat out a few ideas, I hopped on the back, and we drove off. It was an exhilarating experience. As we were driving between random washing machines on the side of the road and dry cleaners, we drove against oncoming traffic on a busy road (at least twice), passed stopped traffic by driving on the sidewalk, swerved between cars at lights, and cut off a few vehicles that were considerably larger than we were. The realization about why motorbikes were considered so dangerous began to dawn on me. Luckily the driver knew what he was doing, and before the day was over he’d probably pull even riskier moves. However, it does not surprise me why motorcycle accidents occur so frequently in Thailand, or anywhere.

After returning from that trip I began to consider the possibility of driving a motorbike myself. I was still rather hesitant, but eventually went for it. I must admit, I am very glad I did. Driving around town has a whole new flare about it. One of the most common things I hear other motorbike drivers mention is their desire to avoid complacency. When one driving a motorcycle or a scooter becomes comfortable on the road, accidents are far more common. As I’ve thought about that fact in conjunction with my experience on a motorbike in Thailand, I’ve begun to realise why that is. The motorcycle taxi driver in Thailand was more than comfortable in his career. He took risks that I would never have taken, and drove in places that weren’t meant for motorized vehicles. Yet because he’s become comfortable, he didn’t have any problem with it. When that happens, accident frequency goes up.

The government has provided a system of roads going nearly anywhere in the country. It has also provided us with a system of laws, not to gravel the populace, but to protect them. Though often times we feel a certain degree of comfort that makes us feel we can take things into our own hands, in essence we are sacrificing our safety and the safety of those around us. Our Father in Heaven likewise has provided a system by which we are able to have safety. The safety we have from Him is spiritual as well as physical, true and real peace being the most common manifestation of that safety. He has also provided us the way by which we are able to know the law. In the gospel of John, chapter 14, verse 6, Jesus Christ, the Only Begotten Son of the Father, urges us that He is “the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father but by [Him].” This well-known verse is simply profound. By Christ and by Christ alone are we able to gain exaltation. Rather than this being an instance of shutting out all those who don’t follow Christ, this is rather an invitation to come unto Him and partake of the blessing He wants all to have. By following and trusting Him, we can gain true happiness.

At the same time, however, this admonition to follow Christ is a warning. By no other way can we have these blessings. This means that we are unable to gain these blessings based on our own philosophies or our own paths. Like the motorcycle taxi driver in Bangkok, one may feel complacent with following Christ and begin to make his own route. He may begin to take risks that he would have previously avoided. In essence, he follows Christ generally, but his heart is not there. And, like many motor-bikers, accidents happen. That is why Christ invited, urged, pleaded with us to become a disciple of Him, to seek to become like Him. He is the way, the truth, and the life. I have felt His power in my life, and I know that it is real. The promise of serenity–of significantly decreased risk factors–through Him is to all, on conditions of simply relying on Him.

Surfing

This past weekend I had the opportunity to don my wetsuit and throw myself out into the waves of the Pacific ocean, all the while attempting to stand up on a board that was being hurled back towards the shoreline by the waves.  I will admit that the vast majority of the times I threw myself into the ocean, the ocean threw me back in a similarly mercilessly nature.  I am not an experienced surfer; in fact, I just picked it up a few months ago.  However, I enjoy immensely and am already looking forward to my next opportunity to take on the powers of nature.

As a skier I’m used to standing on boards moving at fast velocities.  Granted, surfing is different than skiing, but it’s also similar in many aspects, such as setting edges, balancing, and taking falls.  It does have its share of unique muscle demands and coordination nuances, but that is part of the reason why I’m so interested in it.  Furthermore, the playing field is constantly changing.  When skiing, if one misses a patch of fresh powder he or she can ride or hike back up to it.  When surfing, the waves aren’t so obvious (though they can be predictable).

It’s interesting to me to see how things can be so similar and yet at the same time so totally different.  We as human beings have the incredible ability to train our bodies and minds to perform in certain ways.  Often times there are aspects that connect different activities together, but there are generally enough aspects to make each new endeavor difficult in its own right.  For example, alpine skiing, telemark skiing, and skate skiing are all carried out on skis.  Thus, the common elements of having long, skinny boards attached at the feet is shared among the three sports.  However, anyone who has experience with the three will attest that they all use very different techniques, and all have a significant learning curve despite prior experience.  When I was learning how to skate ski, I was (and still sometimes am) totally perplexed at the fact that I was wearing skis because they handle so differently from other varieties.  Learning to telemark was a similar experience.  I think that having a background in skiing certainly helped, especially in terms of balance, but it did not mean that learning a new style could occur in a matter of hours.  It still took lots of practice, lots of energy, and lots of focus to be able to become proficient.

I think this can be applied spiritually as well as physically.  When I was serving as a missionary in Thailand for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I saw many instances in which this occured.  Often times people are able to feel the influence of the Holy Ghost.  Sometimes this is referred to as the Light of Christ.  Some people are particularly sensitive to it.  However, it does not mean that learning that the church is true or becoming converted to Christ is an easy topic.  While it does help point them to Christ, each person must still put in the energy, the work, the focus, and the sacrifice to truly experience the blessings that Christ would have them enjoy.  It’s disheartening for me to see people expect to bypass the sacrifice necessary to have a complete conversion.  Even Christ’s own disciples had to go through fierce storms in order to lead them to complete conversion.  The storm through which they pass in Mark, chapter 4, verses 35-41, is not only a physical manifestation of Christ’s power, but also a symbol of the spiritual storms through which they will later have to pass.

We all have to pass through storms in our life.  No matter how experienced we are, no matter how finely tuned our skills are, no matter how prepared we are, life will present storms that throw us around.  Were it not so we could not progress spiritually.  We are allowed to pass through these storms in order that we might, using skiing or surfing as a metaphor, spiritually develop balance, strength, endurance, awareness, and other attributes.  At times it seems that there is no break in the winds, or the clouds only become darker.  However, it is in those moments when we can turn to our Savior and seek to hear his words, “Peace, be still.”  I have felt His power in my own life, not necessarily to calm the storm but to calm me so that I can weather the storm.  I have a firm knowledge that the storms through which I have passed have shaped me and have taught me.  I would not trade them for anything.  To trust in the Savior is to voluntarily accept to pass through some of the fiercest storms one can imagine.  However, to trust in the Savior is also to allow Him to bestow upon us his peace.

Moe Berg

I recently finished reading a most excellent book called The Catcher was a Spy by Nicholas Dawidoff.  The book basically jumped off the shelf at me when I was at the bookstore one day.  I was looking for something to read (for some reason it was at a time when I didn’t have a huge list of books), and as I was perusing the shelves this book captured my attention.  As a fan of J.D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye, I was initially intruiged by the play off of the title.  Then I began to think about what the title meant, and was even more intruiged.  In the end my curiosity got the better of me and I bought the book.

It took me a while to get through it due to the fact that the term started when I was about halfway through.  However, I gradually plowed through, reading a little here and a little there, and in the end finished.  The book is very well written, and is a fascinating study on the life of a very unique man.  In short, Moe Berg was a Princeton and Colombia Law graduate who spoke a slew of different languages, and, right out of university, began playing professional baseball.  Despite his intense thirst for knowledge, he opted to play baseball for a good portion of his life.  During WWII the United States formed the OSS, the precursor organization to the CIA, and Moe Berg decided to change professions.  After a very successful few years as a spy gathering intelligence about nuclear physics, the war ended and Berg spent the rest of his life as a vagabond, never holding a job again and living off of friends and family members.

I was perplexed about this man’s choice for the latter part of his life.  He certainly did not lack the ability to become very successful in just about whatever field he chose.  Yet he decided to choose nothing instead.  It was almost frustrating to me to read account after account of how Berg would pass up incredible opportunities or intentionally neglect aspects of life that would have ensured success.  At one point, the author makes an interesting point.  He mentions (and I paraphrase) that though Berg was very impressive to others, to himself he was not impressive.  This feeling alone became a limiting factor.  I felt a blow of resonance as I read this.  I can attest that I’ve felt a similar feeling, and it has been a limiting factor.  There have been a few times when, in hindsight, I’ve wondered what opportunities I’ve passed up due to the fact that I doubted myself.  For Berg, the opinions of countless people did not help the fact that he did not believe himself to be impressive.

It’s almost a pity that Berg did not have a bigger impact on the world because for such a man it would have been possible.  Yet at the same time, his life provides hope to others.  After reading this book I began to seriously reflect, and I realised that I don’t want to miss any opportunities because I doubt in myself.  I am sure it is perfectly normal for people to feel unimpressive; after all, they live with themselves every day.  However, others certainly hold a different view.  Now, this is not an argument to support conceitedness or pride.  But it is an argument for belief in oneself.

As I mentioned in a previous post, Christ sees us as how we can become.  So, how does one gain access to such a view?  Often times I think it takes more than simply expanding our own view, as that is often too limited.  I sincerely feel that Christ has a view of our potential that is even greater than that which we can imagine.  There have been a few times of my life when I have realised that this is the case.  For example, when I was in Thailand as a missionary for the LDS church, I realised that I had grown spiritually and emotionally more in the space of two years than I had in the space of ten years.  I went into the mission with an idea of who I wanted to become.  After finishing those two years I realised that, because of the power of God, I had surpassed that.  I had become better than my expectations.

I don’t mean boast.  I hope it doesn’t come off that way, because the truth is I had very little to do with it.  I give all the credit to God.  It was He who made it possible for me to develop.  The truth is I was able to witness the change in myself, and I was amazed by it.  All I did was rely on Him and strive to do His will.  In John chapter 7, verse 17, Jesus tells the Jews, “If any man will do His will, he shall know of the doctrine, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of myself.”  As one comes to “know of the doctrine,” it begins to take root in one’s heart.  As I dedicated myself to serving Christ in His way, I felt that I came to know of the doctrine.  And, because of that, my heart began to be changed.  I wanted to follow Christ, not because my parents had or because my friends were.  I wanted to follow Christ because I knew that through Him I can gain exaltation.  Through Him I can be truly happy.  As I spent my time in His service, He amplified my abilities.  I gained new understanding and maturity (the latter my friends and family will quickly confirm).  I began to see the power that He has in helping us to attain our potential.  Indeed, I came to realize that I don’t have the slightest idea of what I can become.  God, however, does, and one of the reasons He sent His son was in order to make it possible for everyone to accomplish it.

So, though there are times when self doubt becomes a significant limiting factor, it does not have to be permanent.  God knows who we are.  When we put our trust in Him, we do not have to worry about what others think of us or how we measure up.  As we exercise faith in Him, He will shape us and perfect us, and we will become more than we could possibly imagine.

Mud Slinging

Around this time of year I am amazed at how inhumane people can be.  Espescially in a political sense.  Part of the reason that I don’t have a huge desire to go into politics is because of all the unkind, slanderous, and downright mean comments that get thrown back and forth between candidates and between supporters of those candidates.  I am amazed at the flood of emails that I receive, not advocating their own candidate, but trying to make the other candidate look unintelligent, incapable, or a sporting a quiver of other unforgiveable weaknesses.  And this flies both ways.  In the political world, this is often referred to as “mud slinging.”  And it’s a fitting way to describe it, too.  In my opinion, however, the act of mud slinging is only self-destructive.  It makes the one who slings the mud dirtier than the one getting hit by it.  After all, in order to sling mud one must be willing to get mud all over their hands.  I don’t agree with this policy of trying to tear down the crediblility of another candidate.  In fact, I hold those candidates who refuse to participate in this act of verbal warfare in high esteem.

This then brings up an interesting challenge: one must sift through the grime in order to find that which is desired.  I feel it is unethical to decide to vote on a candidate based on the other candidate’s antagonistic approach.  One must dig through the pollutants in order to get to the pure heart of the issues.  This is a common practice found throughout the world, in areas other than politics as well.  People are able to distill pure water from contaminated sources all the time.  This, of course, requires work, but in the end the result is more favorable than the sacrifice.

Politics is an interesting field, in that it tends to bring out both the best and the worst of human relations.  Clashing opinions can lead to either progress or stagnancy.  This is a pattern not only found in the chambers of congress, but also in one’s own self.  Every person has both moments of brilliance and moments of dishonor in their life.  Indeed, life is a time to learn from ones mistakes and move forward, constantly adapting and progressing towards perfection.  And we have Christ, who makes it possible.  One of the most incredible aspects of Christ’s power is that He can see through the filth that bears us down.  While we are still responsible for that uncleanliness, He provides a way by which we are able to remove the spots and become clean.  He sees what we can be, where we may only see what we are.  That is how He saw those he healed physically.  In Matthew, chapter 8, Christ not only touches a leper (one who was an embodiment of uncleanliness to the Jews), but doesn’t hesitate when the man comes to Him seeking to be healed.  The leper’s faith made it possible for him to be healed by Christ; that’s what Christ saw when approached by him.  Where others would avoid and shun the leper, Christ saw who he really was and knew what he could be.  This is how we all stand in His sight.  He knows us.  He knows our potential.  He invites all to partake of His atonement so that we, too, may see ourselves as He sees us.  Through Him, all may be cleansed of the grime that may even have come to define one’s life.  That is the greatest miracle performed by Christ, and one that He performs in our times as well as in ancient times: the miracle of spiritual healing.

Back Roads

A few weekends ago I went to climb a mountain and experienced what could be termed bipolarity.  I’ve previously attempted to summit this peak twice, yet wasn’t able to make it either time.  I figured that because I didn’t have much time left before it would be completely snowed over, I better get to it.  So, Saturday, 18 October, I decided to take it on.  I was actually planning to do some moderate hiking (nothing too intensive) but the prospect of climbing a mountain hit me as I was driving and I changed my plans.  Climbing mountains, to me, is the pinnacle of hiking.  I turned onto the back road that lead to the base of the mountain I was after, and began the 45-minute trek.  The road hasn’t been maintained, so there are some pretty hairy moments, but my car was able to handle it alright.  I did get some odd looks from people in trucks that were twice the size of my compact, four-wheel-drive sedan.  However, I made it without any trouble.  I was able to climb, summit, revel in the snow at the summit, and descend without any trouble at all.  I was elevated, both physically and emotionally, and I am now planning ways I can make it back there with my skis.

At the top I looked at the road on which I had driven up.  The road starts from where I turned on and weaves its way through the mountains, heading south, until it exits at a canyon about fifteen minutes south of my home.  The road on which I had driven up was replete with switch-backs.  Having driven it, I knew that it was also in bad condition.  The road heading south was straight and didn’t look nearly as chopped up as the road to the north.  I decided to check it out.  I have ridden my mountain bike the entire length of the road, and from what I remembered it wasn’t that far away.  I actually thought I was at the halfway point.  So, I started driving south.  The road, though straight, was in terrible condition.  It, of course, had received the same lack of maintenance as the stretch to the North.  Furthermore, by the time I realised that it was also about three times as long as the northern portion, I was already closer to that end.  As I drove on, conditions didn’t improve.  At first it was exciting, but after hitting rock field after rock field I was worn out.  Continued poor roads began to help me understand Dante’s Inferno on a new level.  By the time I had made it out, I had made the resolve never to drive on that road ever again.  Actually, to tell the truth, I had made that resolve several times.

As I was speeding back on the pavement (which, I realized, I take for granted far too often), I had time to think about the whole experience.  Climbing the mountain hadbeen an incredible experience for me.  Driving back had been the exact opposite.  It made me think about that which I have been studying in the Book of Matthew in the New Testament.  So many times the Savior must have experienced similar feelings.  For example, on the Mount of Transfiguration (chapter 17), Christ was able to converse with Moses and Elijah, both of whom knew who He was and what His mission was.  They had prophesied of Him, they had complete faith in Him, and they understood what His role as messiah meant.  Furthermore, the voice of God the Father was heard announcing the authority of His son.  James E. Talmage, a modern apostle of Jesus Christ who was called and given authority just as in ancient times, points out in his book Jesus The Christ that coming down off the mountain must have been like day and night.  After the incredible events that occured on the mount, Jesus was greeted with the inability of His disciples to cast out a devil due to their unbeleif.  From circumstances where truth and light were encompassing to circumstances where faith was weak and understanding imperfect must have been rather difficult for Jesus.  I’m sure He felt rather worn out after that, and after hundreds of other contrasting experiences.  Yet He was willing to take them on because of His love.  He was willing to experience the pains–physical, emotional, and spiritual–of mortality in order that He might know how to comfort us.  Alma, in the Book of Mormon, expains this in Alma chapter 7, verses 11-13.  He was ever patient.  He was ever willing to sacrifice that others might understand.  He never complained or questioned the will of His Father.

So, as I was driving home I saw great room for improvement in myself.  I realized I could have handled that better.  It is most certainly a gradual process, and I don’t think I will drive that road unless it is absolutely necessary, but I do have an idea of how I can become more like the Savior.  Christ set the example of how to handle adversary in general, both on a long-term and a day-to-day basis.  One of my endeavors is to therefore emulate His patience and His hope.  He has set the way, and through Him it is possible to face trials with optimism.

Red Fingers

Index finger, red color courtesy of saffranin

Today I was working in a lab performing a simple gram-stain test on various types of bacteria.  It was most excellent.  I really enjoy working in a lab, which part of the reason that I want it to be a major part of my profession.  Anyways, the laboratory procedures I was performing today are quite standard throughout the world for classifying bacteria.  I loved it.  And it was an added bonus that I didn’t get any of the stains on my hands!  I was able to keep my fingers unstained throughout the entire procedure.  Until the end, that is.  As I was cleaning up materials, I didn’t notice that the bottle containing saffranin, a red dye, was not totally cleaned off.  I ended up getting the beautiful, bright red stain all over my index finger.  This stuff sticks, too.  That’s why it’s used to stain bacteria.  So, after washing my hands four or five times–and sincerely trying to scrub them–my finger is still a nice shade of red.  Not that I mind at all; it is a nice battle scar, and isn’t permanent, and not harmful.  However, it does get a bit annoying I look down at my finger and it looks burned.

So, as I was studying my finger’s unnatural hue today, I started thinking about the whole thing, as I often find myself doing.  I was also reading in the Book of Matthew in the New Testament earlier today, and had some interesting thoughts.  The story in Matthew, chapter 8, about the leper that comes to Jesus and desires to be clean has always impressed me.  I am impressed by the readiness with which the Savior responds to the leper’s plea.  The leper has complete faith that he can be made clean through the power of Jesus Christ.  And, because of this great faith, Christ simply responds, “I will.”  The Redeemer has no hesitation in healing and making this man clean.

So then I started making connections with my apparantly gram-negative finger (though I didn’t run it through the entire process, were one to evaluate based on the results with no knowledge of the protocol he or she would conclude that I stain gram-negative).  I think that it is interesting how so often we fall into spiritual uncleanliness when we least expect it.  I took the utmost caution to keep my hands out of the dye throughout two complete staining cycles, yet in the end still managed to come out with impurities on my hands.  Furthermore, this is something that soap won’t rinse off.  I can’t get it off by myself, unless I were to cut it off (which would present its own set of problems).  The leper in Matthew 8 was similar: he was unable to become clean by himself.  He needed the Savior to become pure once again.  So does everyone, in a spiritual sense.  Though we may be in the depths of filth and impurities, the Savior has the power to lift us out and cleanse us.  Nephi, a Book of Mormon prophet, explains in chapter 25 that this is the reason that He suffered, died, and was resurrected.  Because Christ accomplished the atonement, He has the power to heal us both physically and spiritually.  He loves us more than we can comprehend, to the point that He wants to do this for us, knowing full well that we will probably slip back again.  However, the invitation in last verses of Matthew chapter 11 is always available to each of us: to come unto Him and find rest.  He will never leave us without hope; He will always be willing to make us clean, if we but show our faith and cry out to Him.

Autumn

The leaves have begun their annual tendancy to do away with their chlorophyll and revert to carotenoids.  This, of course, leads to the magnificence of fall colors.

I recently found myself in awe at the the incredible display.  I was walking to class one day and I noticed the plethora of color on the mountainside, and it struck me.  Due to the fact that I’ve spent the last two years in Thailand, serving a mission of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, it’s been a while since I’ve seen the autumn alteration.  In fact, I’ve been living in a perpetual summer since about May 2005.  At first I missed the regular change of the seasons, but after a few months I became accustomed to the tropical climate of Thailand, and didn’t really think twice about it.

Having grown up in the western United States, I saw the leaves change color every year.  It wasn’t surprising in the least to me.  I don’t remember ever being totally awed by the sight, unless the leaves were piled up several meters by a very patient and intricate guy with a rake.  So I was a bit surprised at my first resonse; this feeling of intruigue, mixed with amazement, was new to me.

I found some connection with my study of the New Testament.  For millenia the Jews had looked forward to a Messiah who would come to liberate them, and when He finally came most of them totally missed it.  As Jacob, a prophet from ancient America, explains in the Book of Mormon, the Jews “[looked] beyond the mark” (Jacob chapter 4, verse 14).  This isn’t something that is terribly surprising to me.  After all, the word “Messiah” in Hebrew means “anointed one.”  And, to the ancient Jews, those who were anointed were kings and priests (as well as others, but particularly kings and priests were those who were anointed to their sacred role).  Based on the precedent, I probably would have been expecting someone different as well.  During the first part of the first century AD, I would venture to say that waiting for the Messiah to come may have been more comfortable than actually expecting Him to come.  In other words, it was part of the their tradition to wait for Him, so when He actually came they didn’t know it was Him (or they outright rejected Him).

Like my experience with the leaves, life had become so rooted in this tradition that even the 12, those who were closest to the Savior, didn’t fully understand His mission.  He constantly had to explain what was to happen–an example can be found in Mark chapther 14 verses 3-9, where Jesus has to explain the actions of the woman who comes to anoint Him.  She recognized and understood the mission of the Savior, even if His apostles didn’t yet.  Most people did not see Him as the promised Messiah, because they were looking beyond the mark.  In a way, it’s similar to missing the beauty of the changing forest.  It was something with which they had grown up, and as a result it was not anything that caught their attention.

However, there were those who, both before and after Jesus’ resurrection, did recognize Him as the Savior and Redeemer of the world.  Like me coming back from Thailand and noticing, in detail, the changing leaves, there were those who knew why the law of Moses was given and knew for what they were to look.  I always admired those who could be amazed at the colors of the fall year after year.  Hopefully we can be like this in a spiritual sense: having the ability to see the influence and power of the Savior in our own lives, time after time.  It’s a great skill to be able to have the openness to see even the little ways that our Father in Heaven shows His love for us.  I hope that if I had lived in Israel in the first century AD, I would have been able to recognize Jesus Christ as the Son of God, the Savior and Redeemer of the world, the Messiah.  It is one of my great endeavors to tune my perception finely enough to be able to see the mark exactly, and not look past it.